The Lowedown on “Ocean’s 8” (PG-13 – Theatrical – US)

Ocean’s 8

Ocean's 8

Genre: Comedy/Heist

Or: “How well the sister plans the perfect heist and how well Rihanna looked in that dress”

In the road of life, there are passengers and there are drivers…and I drove to the theater to watch “Ocean’s 8” with a lot of anticipation.  I have been cheering from the first trailer…and I kept cheering after it was over.  It gave me exactly what I wanted, but unfortunately no fringe benefits. So let’s break it down in true Ocean’s 8 fashion…we’ll get all the pieces together first and then execute The Lowedown.


Sandra Bullock, Cate Blanchette, Rihanna, Helena Bonham Carter, Anne Hathaway, and of course James Cordon. The cast is what makes the movie for me…a tremendous cast of beautifully strong women coming together like George Clooney’s group did in “Ocean’s 11” (and you know…James Cordon). I felt like a kid in a candy store with this cast, so I can’t help but give it ten points.


There was not a whole lot to do here…the stage is set early and the characters are established early. It was really kind of set in stone as to who they are and that was based on what they could do. So although it was a great cast, I cannot give full points for the acting ability.  It’s not their fault…there just was no room to move.  I’ll give it a seven.


Debbie Ocean gathers an all-female crew to attempt an impossible heist at New York City’s yearly Met Gala. The plot was almost perfect…copying the engine from the other Oceans was a nice move. Why is it almost perfect you ask? Well, I’ll tell you…I had a bit of an issue with that they were stealing a necklace. It wasn’t a casino with a jerk for a boss…just a hundred million dollar necklace. Like I said, almost perfect


There was plus a cameo that was really fun. So yeah it was an American style ending, but I was expecting that. It was the surprise that gives it all the points…and the number of points is seven. See those points in the Twist score.


With the ensemble in play here, you would think they had a problem with character development. I actually thought that went well…there were a few holes in the story but it was a pretty solid attempt. Helena Bonham Carter shines for me in the story and I would have liked more from Rihanna in her role. Nine ball corner pocket…but only seven points are awarded for the story.

Ocean's assemble

Favorite Quote: “If you’re going to have a problem with stealing, then you’re not going to like the rest of this conversation.”

Genre: Comedy


I want to belly laugh when I watch a comedy…I mean like full on out of breath, checking my pants to make sure I didn’t pee laugh. I didn’t get there with this, Unfortunately. There were some funny parts that I liked, but not enough to turn my face red. These eight women only get six points.


The mark of a good comedy is in the chemistry between the cast members…if they can work well together you can see it. Unfortunately, you can also see when they don’t work well together. There were a couple characters that didn’t seem to play well with others. Otherwise a solid effort…I will give them seven points.


Look at it this way…if the Plot is the seed and the Story is the forest…then the script is the sunlight. I just wanted more playroom with the script.  I feel that hurt the story and the acting, but with the size of the cast, I can understand why. Throwing seven points their way.

Sandy B always brings it

Sub-Genre: Heist


The key to a heist movie is that I want them to steal something major and screw over a bad guy in the process. I didn’t quite get what I wanted, but it was close enough to give eight points. The killer part was in the planning…Debbie had over five years to plan the perfect theft. Let’s see…five plus three equals eight, so I’ll give them eight points (no I didn’t really do it like that).


The twist is sometimes connected to the Ending. But with heist movies, I score the twist separate, as I feel that is an essential part of the movie.  Could one of them have a separate agenda or there be a secret ninth Ocean? I won’t tell you, but it was pretty cool. Nine points awards for the gem of a twist I did not expect.

My Score: 7.7

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